Happy Anniversary

Yesterday, Liam and I celebrated our 10th wedding anniversary! It's unbelievable to me. I'm married to the most amazing man- my best friend and soul mate. A decade later, I'm still incredibly thankful for the gift of getting to spend the rest of my life with him. I love you, honey. I'm the most blessed gal ever! Thanks for being a fabulous husband and friend. It's been an incredible journey. I can't wait to see where the next ten years will lead us.

Happy New Year everyone! May 2011 bring you much love

and happiness.

Missing Aidan

Our baby boy is 5 months old today. I can't believe it! Somedays I feel so close to him, like there's not an ocean dividing us, and other days its as if I'm living a dream and I'm afraid to wake up. I've prayed for this child so long that I'm having a hard time imagining that he'll be with us soon. I wonder what he's like. Does he have hair now (in his referral pics he was bald)? What's his personality like? Is he mild-mannered and laid-back or will he live up to his Leo (Lion) birth sign reputation (not that I've ever held much belief in those things)? What are his likes and dislikes? There's so much about this little boy that I need to discover.

As I know I've mentioned before, I've discovered something new about myself through this process. I am NOT a patient person. Waiting is difficult, but waiting without news is excrutiatingly painful. I want my little boy home! I want to know that he's healthy and happy, and not just have faith in these things, but to see them with my own eyes (hmmm...do you think God might be trying to teach me something?). My little boy is halfway around the world and I'm not there to hold him when he cries or laugh when he does something funny. I'm not there to wake up in the night to feed him and cuddle him back to sleep or show him off to family and friends or even change his diapers- things that most parents take for granted and even complain about. I'm not there to do any of that. It hurts me to think of all that he has endured and will endure in his first few months. He's already had to endure the loss of his birth mother, then in a few short weeks, he'll move from the countryside to the city and leave behind the only caregivers that he's ever known (other than the brief time he spent with his birthmother)- two huge losses in his young life. As if that's not enough, then he'll have to leave those caregivers, his country, culture, language, everything that helps to define usas people to board a plane with strangers and head to a new home, with new family, culture, language, new everything.

While I'm waiting, I've been trying to keep busy. We are nearly finished with his nursery (not the Christmas Eve deadline we had hoped for) and are moving his furniture in today. I'll post pictures soon.

Our 10-year anniversary is tomorrow. Please God, some news of a court date is all that I want and hope for.

Our little boy is growing and I'm missing it all. How can I ever get this time back?

Is it really already Christmas?

A little elf (Ava Rose) told me that there are only 4 days until Christmas.

Christmas presents are bought (but not wrapped- YIKES!) and I'm on Christmas break for the next two weeks. Yay! We've started (though barely) on the nursery and hope to have most of it accomplished before Christmas Eve.

This year will be a bit bittersweet. Aidan, of course, will not be with us (as of this moment, we are still waiting for a court date), but little Ava is here and well. This will be our last Christmas Eve spending the night at my sister's house so that we can be there first thing in the morning when Jake and Ella open their gifts, but next year we'll start new traditions with our little boy.

Here's wishing all of you a joyous Christmas. God bless!

9 weeks and waiting...

Nuff said!

Happy Birthday, Honey!

Happy Birthday to the best husband, uncle, son, brother, friend, soldier and now daddy in the world! You mean everything to me and I love and appreciate you SO much. Thanks for making the last 10+ years the happiest of my life.

I know I sound like a broken record, but...

It's been 2 months- and some change- since our referral AND still no court date! The waiting it becoming SO hard. I just want news before Christmas, and hopefully, that news is a court date, but I'd settle for an update and some pictures. I miss our son SO MUCH. It's so difficult being halfway across the world from him...and he's only 4 months old! He needs his mommy and daddy! I'm afraid if we don't have news soon, this Christmas will be very difficult on all of us (which, I know, is not keeping with the true meaning of Christmas). Why am I obsessing so?!? Please, oh please, let us get a court date soon- for all of our sanity, but mine the most. :)

Just in time for the Holiday Season~

I thought it would be fitting with the approach of Christmas to share a video about the origin of Holt International. It also helps me from going batty waiting for news from Ethiopia (hence, the new blog design). Enjoy!

Here I am again....

I emailed Jenn today to see if they had any news of a court date for us. She said that they are planning to submit our paperwork this week. Yay! Neither the notification, nor the court date, for that matter, can come soon enough!

8 weeks...

Yep, 8 weeks since our referral.

LONG WEEKS!

Four (or more) families were notified yesterday that they have a court date. I'm so excited for them! It's a bit bittersweet, because 3 of those families received referrals after ours. I'm trying not to be impatient or frustrated with the process, but it's REALLY hard getting passed over. I keep praying that Aidan's okay and that our paperwork is in order. Unfortunately, this has just brought back some painful memories and feelings from our infertility. It's so hard to be on that roller coaster ride and hear of other's getting pregnant. As excited as I was for them, I couldn't help feel a bit envious and think "Why not me?!? They've only been trying for a month (or two, or three) when we've been trying for 4 years!" So, not my most attractive moments, and definitely not how I want to live my moments waiting for our son to come home. I have to remember that this isn't about me (or Liam), it's about Little A and when it's best for him to come home. Only God knows the timing. And I trust Him!

I'm really trying to keep faith that God is in control of this and that His plan is perfect. I just wish we had some news. Please keep Liam and me (more me...as Liam is proving to have the patience of Job) in your prayers, that we would have patience during this process. Here's praying for some great news today.

Congratulations!

Wow, three blog entries in one day; that's a new record. Exciting news today! There have been 3 court date notifications given out within the last few hours (that we know of). All are for February 14th, Valentine's Day. How perfect is that?!? Meeting your child (and falling in love) for the first time on the day set aside for love. Perfect!

One of the people who was notified today is Cerise. We received our referrals on the same day and our little boys' birthdays are only 3 days apart. The others that were notified today got their referrals after ours, so I'm really praying we will hear something soon. I can't wait to hold and smooch my little boy!

In Remembrance...

Today's the anniversary of the attack on Pearl Harbor. Giving thanks today for all of our service men and women- be they past, present or future- who continue to put their lives in jeopardy serving our wonderful nation. Thank you for all that you do.

Tick-Tock, Tick-Tock...

Nothing new to report. We're still waiting for a court date. The last time that I contacted Holt, they said that the process could take between a month to two months (of course, this was before the delays with the license renewal). Tomorrow will be 8 weeks since our referral. Our little guy continues to grow (as he's supposed to), but I'm wishing that we could somehow stop time and keep him as young as possible. Doesn't every parent wish for that? He was 18 weeks on Saturday. We miss you so much our sweet baby boy. Your daddy and I pray every night (really the only prayer we pray now) for you to come home to us soon. Our family won't be complete until you're with us. Love you more with every day that passes.

My new favorite Christmas song...

My brother-in-law suggested that I listen to this song. So, completely off topic from the adoption, I'm sharing it with you.

It's amazing the perfection when you actually consider God's plan for our salvation. Makes me feel so humble and grateful beyond words. Remembering the true reason for Christmas and rejoicing in His birth.

Great News!

We just received word that the licensing has been renewed, so we're all clear for a court date. Let's pray we hear something soon (like today)! :)

It's official...

The situation in Ethiopia (with the license renewal) will- and probably has already- affect us. Holt hopes to resolve the issue before the end of the month, however, nothing is guaranteed at this point. So, it doesn't look like we'll have a court date before Liam's birthday, or even before Christmas.

We're disappointed, yes. Frustrated, definitely, but we're also trying to see God's will in all of this. We have faith in our adoption agency, faith in Our Heavenly Father, and faith that when Aidan is supposed to be home, then God will bring him home.

We love you little guy. Nothing has changed, except we may not get to see and hold you as soon as we had hoped.

Trying to look at the bright side...

Well, it's been 7 weeks since our referral. I'm really praying that we hear some news soon. With every day that passes, I'm growing more and more concerned and paranoid that something is wrong. Holt has reassured us that everything is progressing normally and there are other families that received referrals on the same day as us that have not been assigned a court date either, but it's still hard to stay positive. We did receive notification the other day that one of the agencies that Holt uses in Ethiopia is going through a review so that their license will be renewed. Without going into too much detail in such a public forum, this is all very normal and is mandatory for all adoption agencies working in Ethiopia. Holt has said that they suspect the process will be over quickly, but in the meantime, this COULD cause some delays.

However, I'm trying to stay positive and keep myself busy. Over our Christmas break we intend to get the nursery set up. The bedding came in yesterday, and I also received a call from the furniture store that all the furniture that Mom and Dad bought us for Christmas is in, as well. It's fun to imagine what it will look like when we have all the pieces put together. So, onward and upward we go, trusting that God's timing is perfect and Little A will come home soon.