Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Welcome to our adoption journey!
I meant to start this blog ions ago. In my mind, I had it all planned out. I was going to provide a written legacy of our journey through the adoption process for our child once he or she is old enough to want to know about the details. Why am I surprised that this blog hasn't gone as planned? Nothing about our longing to start a family has gone as planned. Over three years of infertility, followed now by three miscarriages. I suppose that's why we have to trust in God, though. The last four years is nothing that I would have ever planned, but I don't regret any of it, because it has led us here...number 12 on the waitlist for the referral of our little baby. There isn't a child that is more wanted or anticipated than this one. I've dreamt of this baby...our baby, for so long. In the beginning the dream was to get pregnant, but through waiting and loss, God has given us a different dream. There are currently 5 million orphans in Ethiopia~ 5 million! Somewhere in all the lonliness of infertility, and make no mistake about it, infertility is the most isolating experience that I have ever had (isolating from other women that are able to experience motherhood, isolating from my spouse, who though he may try to understand, can never fully appreciate the guilt and frustration that not being able to have a child can cause, and isolating from God, who I have felt at times has deserted me/us), our Lord has seen to it for a childless couple to find hope renewed through one small motherless child. Isn't God amazing?